June 27, 2011 NEED TO BE SPIRITUALLY UPLIFTED... READ THIS ONE!!

Hello Mom & Dad

Well things are getting better. Sometimes the Lord brings us low so he can rise us up. Its a very humbling experience and I am grateful for it all. You get the worst of worst and the best of best. We are literally fighting with Satan, sometimes it gets frustrating but its amazing the power of the Atonement Yesterday was amazing the Canyon Gate ward welcomed home one of their sister missionaries, they had three out now its down to two. But it was great and just the thing that I needed, it was an answer to my prayers. This past week has been hard there has been a lot of struggles and trials but her talk helped me so much.

 

Thank you for the Birthday wishes. Its kind of weird to have a birthday on a mission but everyone has been so loving about, its awesome. I think most of the ward knows, so probably over half the ward. We got cake on Saturday night from the Goodnoughs, Brother Goodnough reminds me of Grandpa so much its funny. Also we went to the Deckers to decorate their door because it was Sister Deckers birthday that day so we got caught in the process basically. We were driving off and her grandsons Kaden and Van were running down the road and sister decker came out as well so we turned around :) And they gave us cake as well it was pretty awesome. So we went in and saw her family and met more of her kids.

 

I got the package on Saturday I wasnt going to open it but I decided to because I kind of figured that you wrapped my presents. But I havent opened them yet I am going to wait until tomorrow. But thank you for the scentsy stuff, I was just wishing last week to have something to make the apartment smell good, and I was going to go buy a candle but now I dont have to :) Thank you so much!!

 

My companion and I are getting a long well. Its always a learing experience but I have noticed that she is more like you dad and jeff, and that Sister Sprouse was like you mom. So it has been good to learn and grow from them and understand more of how I can become better. This past week though I have come to understand that I am struggling more because it is a hard process to become a leader and thats what I am learning right now. How to take the lead and be an example to others. But though its so hard and frustating Heavenly Father is right here next to my side to help me through it all.

Thank you for the scriptures I will look them up during personal study. I have learned so much through studying the scriptures in the morning. This transfer for me and reading the scriptures I have learned so much more and my understanding and knowledge of them are increasing more than I even know for myself. One experience this past week was we were over at sister Lords house for dinner. She just had surgery on her knee as well so you mom and her are in the same boat but I was giving the spiritual thought for the night. Well I had this in mind from proverbs 23. I wasnt sure on the verse but I thought that it would be good and I can just skim through it and find it. But when I was looking for it I couldnt find it so I told her about the time we were over at the MacKays house and the same thing happened over there. The scripture that I was thinking of sharing wasn't the one that Heavenly Father wanted me to share. Well the same thing was with Sister Lords, Heavenly Father knew what she needed and I had the thought come to me to just go to where I was studying that morning. Well I did and this one verse that stood out to me that morning was what she needed. She was teary eyed and I realized that Heavenly Father knows his children so well and he knows exactly what they need and I am just an instrument in his hands. But through having scripture study in the morning I helped one of his children in need. I have come to learn that my scripture study in the morning isn't for me but for Gods children that I come to meet everyday. But the scripture I shared with Sister Lords was 3 Nephi 7:18 and it was about Nephi going out and preaching the gospel and the faith that he had in so doing. I really love this verse because at the very end it says that he had so much faith that angels ministered unto him DAILY. That is an amazing thing to have angels administer unto you daily, we can all have this same great faith that Nephi did and we can be blessed to have angels administer unto us daily as well.

 

Today I was reading 3 Nephi 12 and I realized that this is where Christ gives his new commandments I never noticed it before but it was amazing to see all that he taught the people. But verse 15 and 16 stood out to me. It says that a man lighteth a candle and does not put it under a bushel to be hid but on a candelstick to be shone to everyone. Then in verse 16 it says "let your light so shine.....that they may see your good works" These verses are talking to us as members of the Church of Jesus Christ. We are to be examples to all we have the light of Christ upon us and we must not be ashamed of it but must go forth and let the world see it that it may be an ensign to all nations and people and that through our good works they may come to know God. I love what President Uchtdorf said in his talk "preach the gospel at all times and when necessary use words". Our actions speak louder than our words, every parent knows that so well because a child learns from the actions of their parents how their children grow up to be is how their parents were and showed them to become. I was reading the Chasity pamphlet they have and it says we must be clean in thought, action, and speech. What we speak and how we speak about things shows a lot of how are hearts are and the thoughts that come to our mind. Our actions are a reflection of our thoughts and are then a reflection of our hearts desires.

 

I read this book recently called "As a Man Thinketh" it was a great book you can get at Deseret Book for like $5 by James Allen. But he talks about how our thoughts determine our action but also the things that we produce and the people that we attract are in all sense how we really are. If we think bad then we do bad, our thoughts proceed our action. If we are mean and rude to people we can see that our thoughts are not righteous or pure, and we come to see that our hearts are not in the right place either. There were some many great quotes that I got from it that I wrote down but left at home. Hopefully next week I will remember them. I have come to know so much more of my savior on a mission and it has been a blessed journey to go through. I couldnt have asked for anything better, and there wasn't any other way for me to come to know Jesus Christ than to do as he has done and go through what he has gone through. Today for companion study we were talking about our hearts and mind. Sister Sprouse and I had this converstation before because she wants to know what I think but I like to know how people feel, I want to know whats in your heart not whats in your mind. And I realized going along with the book that I read that the heart and mind are so intertwained they go hand and hand. The desires of our hearts produce the thoughts we have and then produces the actions that come. In 1 Nephi it talks about three human senses see, hear, and know; all of them are necessary for every person to experience in this life in order to gain a testimony. We must know, meaning feeling with our hearts of this, we must see it and hear it meaning with our minds, but its through reading the words of christ and then going out and exercising that faith and seeing the fruits of your labors. The fruits of what we produce will show us the efforts that we are putting forth in our life. If we are not having sweet moments of joy we are not doing what is asked of us.

 

We were in the car today as well and I was thinking about how I am in Vegas. Vegas is such a bad place to be especially the strip because of all the wickedness that comes forth from this place but though there is terrible things there are also many righteous things. Here its black and white there is no gray, you can't afford to be gray here or any where. Its amazing that once we realize what side we want to be on will make all the difference of the joy and happiness that we will experience in our life.

 

Yesterday Courtney Wattles came home and gave her coming home talk. She was serving in the Kirtland OH mission, the historical site area. But she talked about the refiners fire. We all must go through it. The refiners fire is our trials, it goes along with Hebrews 11:40. We are to be shaped and molded into a better person. Trials come not because God hates us or doesn't love us but they come because he does love us. He loves us so much that he wants us to become like him and that process is through experiencing trials and struggles. This is how he has become what he is today, through this same process that we ourselves are going through. He loves us so much more that he even gave us his Son Jesus Christ to go through so much more. He gave this precious gift to us to know and to learn upon because through Jesus Christ we can conquer all; Heleman 5:12

 

So Saturday I was struggling, I remember kneeling down to pray that night and just crying to my Heavenly Father. I didnt know what to do and I felt so many emotions. I am still trying to learn and understand myself and its very hard most times. I realized that when I give myself, I give my heart away and for me its a scary thing, it freaks me out. So it was rough for me because I realized when transfers came that day that I give away my heart every time and I don't like it because I am afraid that I am going to get hurt. So Saturday I was still dealing with it and I prayed to Heavenly Father for peace and help. Well when Courtney gave her talk she answered my prayers. She said that she gave her heart away to this lady she was teaching, in that moment, I knew that it is okay to give my heart away. Then came this voice in my head that said don't worry about it, let it alone. It brought so much peace to me because I was struggling so much but those words helped my heart so much. I realized even more today that I am on a mission and Heavenly Father has asked me to give all my heart to him but this also means to all those that I teach and see, every single person I come in contact with I am to give my heart away, to give all that I have. So when I come to the alter of God I have nothing left more to give but once I come to the alter, he is going to give me so much more, he is going to give it all back to what I have just given and he's going to give me more than what I have given.

 

There will be moments when things are so hard to handle and you don't know what to do but Heavenly Father is here for all of us. We are learning and growing to become leaders. It's a hard process but the blessings will be so worth it. Those moments of enlightenment will be like the Heavens opening up and pouring out its blessings upon you. You will need help through it all, but just remember that angels will be around about you to bear you up. You will feel their love and power guiding you along the way. I know that Heavenly Father loves us so much that he wants us to become even more like him.

 

I was excited to see the baby shower invite, thank you for it. I am glad you are doing it on my birthday, I know that one day the baby will look back and remember that they celebrated that day for her on my birthday. Thank you!

 

Our investigators are doing good. I have seen so much of the things I have gone through in my past through so many people. Its scary because I feel like I have to relive it but its comforting to know that I have overcome it because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ and his love and forgiveness is beyond measurement.

I have come to find out that people just have to move on from the things that have happened and "let it alone". It is hard to see people not change, but I have come to see that everyone has their agency and sometimes they are just not willing to change. Everything starts from the heart if we don't have that desire to understand or want to change then they are just going to stay the same. It's hard to see people not have that desire, but there's not much you can do about it. It was interesting to see that Christ gave all that he had for us, his whole heart. Even when he gave his whole heart there were still those that rejected them, actually there were many that rejected him. I thought of how that may have felt to give all your heart away and to have people reject you but it shows the ultimate love that he has for all of us and the unconditional love as well.

 

Well thank you for the emails and for the package. I really love hearing the stories and seeing the pictures. I am going to try to write to the ward this week hopefully, we will see it is going to be super busy. But I am going to try to make time at night and in the afternoon. I hope you have a wonderful party tomorrow, I wish I could be there but I will be thinking about you all. I have had to make sacrifices but the blessings that come in return are just as sweet if not sweeter. When we give our lives to God he will not fail us and his blessings are sweeter than we could possibly imagine. I love you both so very much and miss you. I cant wait to see the presents but thank you ahead of time. I'll let you know next week about my day. LOVE YOU & MISS YOU!!! Bunches!
Love Heather Baby Little One